Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Did someone say Frazzled?

Last week, I had mentioned that I started a Bible Study with a group of FABULOUS ladies from my church. Its called Victoriously Frazzled Female and let me tell ya, its been a wild ride so far and we are only on Week 2!

This week it talks about releasing control and giving God all of it. I had a tough time struggling with it because like most moms, I am not about to admit that I am a control freak! Everything is just in a particular order that makes sense to myself and other moms...Just ask my husband! LOL
Anyways, as I began the homework for this week, I prayed and asked God to reveal to me what I need to loosen my control over and to let Him take over. Little did I know that the reveal was coming later that night!

It all started with a trip to J's school for a Parent/Teacher Conference. I knew that they were going to raise the issue with J's maturity level. They had been mentioning that since the second day of school! I figure, just give her time and let her get used to things again. Then I started making the excuses that the teacher was too tough, she's an only child, she will blossom into it after Christmas break, and so on and so on.

Her teacher started out the conference telling us how wonderful we had done working with her and her homework. She also mentioned how J is the sweetest child she has ever taught...then there was the BUT! She felt that J's maturity was going to be a major issue next year and we needed to consider holding her back in the Second Grade.

Really?!?! My child? How is that possible? The one who has been bringing home wonderful grades all year and who has improved in her reading skills, would need to be held back?!?! I immediately started thinking there was no way in the world I was going to do that! What about her friends? What about her Girl Scouts? This was not going according to MY plan!
I cried all the way home. I was shocked and my mind just started barreling out of control with crazy scenarios and countless questions. It was then my husband asked me a question that I couldn't answer.
How should a Christian react to this? Should we pray about it and leave it to God? Or should we keep turning a blind eye to it and just go with the flow?

It was then that I realized that God revealed what I had asked Him.

As a mother, you plan everything for your child. You set goals for your child and help them to achieve it. But when you are planning/dreaming of how it is going to be, you don't realize that God may have a different plan and if we aren't careful, it can jump up out of no where and that's when you feel like you are losing control! I unfortunately did not plan the little hiccups and this was exactly where I needed to step back and let God take control.

If there is something that you have control over, I pray that you trust Him enough to say "Here ya go, Lord! I know You can do better with this than I can!"

Jeremiah 29:11

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Buttons and 2x4's

This week I joined a bible study with a group of ladies from my church! I knew from past experience that this was going to get the devil all riled up. You see, when he sees you reading your Bible, telling others about Jesus, and just over all spreading the Love of Jesus far and wide...he has buttons to push. The buttons are different for each person. For me, the devil starts with the marriage button, then moves on to the child button, the finance button, the work button, and just continues till I cave or surrender all to Jesus.

I like to sometimes picture the devil with a game controller and he's just trying to defeat all the levels in my heart and mind. Well, this week, he created and added a new button. It was the "being a stay at home mom" button.

Yes, he knows where to strike and let me tell ya, that button had a punch behind it. It put doubt in my mind, revealed what others close to me thought about the dream, confused me, and well, you get the point. I seriously felt like my dream was getting farther and farther out of my reach.

So tonight while J and A were doing their own thing, I decided I was tired of being cheerful and happy on the outside and self-doubting on the inside. So I turned off the TV and went to my homework for the Bible Study. As I was doing the prep work, which entailed me reading a particular passage in the Good Book, I got my 2x4 upside the head!

Ya see, I am a bit stubborn when it comes to hearing God. Sometimes my heart is so torn and my thoughts are out of control so much that I can't tell if I am hearing Him or hearing my own thoughts. So,  I pray and ask Him to reveal the answer to me like a 2x4 upside the head....

Anyways, back to my bump on the head! The passage was Romans 8:28-39. We were advised by the author to read it slowly and ask God to speak to us directly. As I got to the 32 verse, my eyes filled with tears and it felt as if I couldn't breath because I was so overcome by it. I slowly realized that God used this Bible Study to speak to me about the new button. The verse says 'He who did not spare his own son but gave him up for us all - how will He not also, along with him, graciously give us all things?'

Think about it...what kind of limits do we set on God and His awesome power? How many times have we prayed and prayed for something but then spoke to others that you doubted it would happen?

I pray that with this verse, I can difuse all of the buttons. As a matter of fact, with this verse, I should remember that regardless of what button is used, God's got control of it all.


Saturday, February 2, 2013

Craving God?

The flu bug made an appearance this week at the homestead and happily it has been defeated! On Tuesday, I had to leave work early to pick up J from school. As I driving, I was listening to my favorite Christian Music station and a commercial for Proverbs 31 Ministries was played. The lady was talking about dieting and how difficult it is to lose weight with all the massive cravings you get during it....but then she asked "are we craving God as much as we are craving the junk food?" Well, this just about blew me off the road! Think about it. How many times have you said "Oh, I would just die for a chance to do this or to have that?" It made me think about how much I long to be a SAHM and I had to ask myself am I craving God more than I am craving my desires? I mean, I listen to Christain Music, take my Bible to work, teach my child about Jesus, you know..all the Christain things to do. But is it a craving? If so, is it a craving to want more from Him or for just Him? Am I yearning to learn more about Him or do I do just enough to remain comfortable?

I just picked up Made to Crave: Satisfying Your Deepest Desire with God, Not Food by Lysa TerKeurst to help me learn more. I will let you know how it turns out! :)

Have a blessed day!